Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize