Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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