I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
