I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
