Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Randomize
