i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
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