just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I love having hate sex.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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