I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
