that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
foreskin is a definite game changer
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
