Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
