i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
