I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
