she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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