You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize