I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Randomize
