okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Randomize
