But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
