So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
