Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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