I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
