Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
