Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
