Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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