i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
