her vagine was all disorganized.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Randomize
