i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
