i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
We had to coat check the pizza.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
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