I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
