You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
