I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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