hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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