She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
