fuck your aforementioned shoe
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
