So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
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