Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
