To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
