I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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