You're completely useless in the revolution.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
