4 words: hood of his car
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
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