I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Those nachos came to me in a dream
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Randomize
