it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
