so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
