The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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