Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Its about making memories worth repressing
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
