there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
