The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
