You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
