high people should be assigned attendants
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Thank you for not boning my boss.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
