i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
