I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Randomize
