I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize