Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
